Now that I have been in a long distance relationship for almost one year, my beau and I are really starting to plan our future. I feel great about us, I think we are moving in the right direction and I am willing to put all my effort into making us work.
How do I know that my long distance lover is the one? Actually, I don’t. Truth be told, I go through periods where I have serious doubts about our relationship and our future. I worry that our differences will split us apart or that one of us will be bored or feel trapped in our relationship.
I have searched on Google this article title on many occasions in search of clear answers. I have read countless articles that list the top 5 and 10 signs that couples are meant to be together and none of that information has eased my anxieties. I, like many of you, want a supernatural sign or a deep gut feeling that confirms that I will have a happy life with my partner.
Some lucky couples or individuals have received that sign or deep feeling and they know without any doubts that they are meant to be with their partners. Unfortunately, they are not me. I, like them, have periods where I am convinced that the universe wants me to be with my partner but I also have moments of SERIOUS doubt. So why am I moving forward if I have doubts?
I have come to terms with the fact that I will always have some doubts and I am ok with that. My partner and I take the time on a regular basis to evaluate our relationship, share our doubts and fears and determine where we are heading. This helps me see a clear picture of my relationship vs. relying on the picture my fears and feelings paint. Secondly, I try not to focus on the forever anymore as that reality is scary and unknown. Instead, I focus on today and my plan for the near future. Today, I know that I am in a healthy and loving relationship where I am respected and adored. I also trust where we are heading although the future can be scary.
Instead of wondering if I will be with my partner forever, I focus on what I am learning about love, life, myself, and my partner right now. If our relationship were to end, I would not have wasted my time as I have grown so much as a person since I have been with my long distance lover. I am learning more about myself, what I need in a relationship, what I can live without in my life, and what I am willing to do for love.
So what are the signs that your partner is the one? I don’t think the answer is clear or black or white. I know that lasting relationships are based on trust, good communication, honesty, commitment, and respect but I don’t know if there is any perfect sign that a relationship will last forever. This probably means that I will continue to have moments of doubts and fears about my relationship, but who cares! Right now, I am madly in love with my beau and I want to continue moving forward with him!